High Times in the Feudal Era
by Zhen Ji
Summary: Inuyasha has found a Sharpie...No one is safe. But when the marker gets lost in the forests of the feudal era, will ANYTHING be safe?
1. It\'s His Bubbles

**High Times in the Feudal Era**

**Chapter One: It's His Bubbles**

**Summary- InuYasha has found a Sharpie...No one is safe.**

**Note- The song, 'Simple Kind of Lovely' belongs to Kara's Flowers, or, Maroon 5 when there were only four of them. It's not mine!**

It was a typical day in feudal era Japan when Kagome arrived, hauling her large yellow pack over the side of the Bone Eater's Well.

"Lettuce!"

"Cabbage!"

"LETTUCE!"

"CABBAGE!"

Kagome looked to her left to find Miroku, Shippo, InuYasha, and Sango knelt around something. She approached them and down between them at a green leafy plant sprouting from the ground.

Miroku and InuYasha were glaring daggers at each other, each one having the intent to kill burning in their eyes.

"Lettuce, you lecher!"

"Cabbage, dog boy!"

Kagome stepped out of the way as InuYasha tackled Miroku to the ground and rolled down the hill.

Sango looked up at her friend and shook her head. Shippo stayed leaned up against Kirara's stomach while staring at the plant.

"Sango, please tell me you actually know what that is."

"Yes, it's the head of a daikon radish."

"Why didn't you tell them that?" Kagome asked, pointed behind her to the dust clouds rising from the bottom of the hill.

"Even pregnant women need amusement, Kagome." Sango replied, standing up and rubbing her slightly rounded abdomen.

Kagome smiled at her friend as she rubbed the lower area of her back. After they had defeated Naraku, Miroku wasted no time in working for a ring so he could put one on her. And now, one year after their wedding, Sango stood seven months pregnant with their child.

"Kagome, did you bring my cornflakes and ketchup? Oh, and the soy sauce?"

"Sango, that's gross!" Shippo said disgusted, sticking his tongue out and leaping up from Kirara's side.

The small cat demon mewed in protest and rolled over in her sleep. Kagome reached for her backpack and began rummaging through it. Apparently the smell of the ramen in the bottom of the bag caught InuYasha's attention. His head popped up from over the hill, his hair and clothes disheveled.

"Ramen!" InuYasha gave Miroku one last punch to the forehead before bounding up to Kagome with wide eyes and tongue hanging out the side of his mouth.

Kagome turned to him smirking as she handed Sango her craved food items.

"InuYasha, you look so cute! Just like a real puppy."

Something in InuYasha's head clicked, and he went back to the typical grumpy hanyou we have all come to know and love him as.

"Whatever, just hand over the ramen!"

Kagome sighed and dug down to the bottom of her backpack, and a small black tube rolled across the ground.

"Hmm..." InuYasha wondered away from Kagome to follow the odd black tube down the hill...On his hands and knees.

"Here you...go?" Kagome turned around and saw InuYasha's butt disappearing over the hill.

A moment later, Miroku managed to haul himself over to where his wife sat eating her strange mixture.

"Need I ask why I just saw InuYasha chasing a black tube on his hands and knees batting at it like Kirara with a paper charm?"

Kagome stopped suddenly, and turned to Miroku, her face considerably lighter than before.

"What...How long was the tube, Miroku?"

"It was about, ah, five inches long." He held up two fingers to show his approximate measurements.

"And the color?"

"Black and a light gray with writing on it. It said something like Sharpie, I think."

"OH CRAP!"

Kagome jumped up and sent the contents of the bag everywhere on the feudal era ground. She slid down the hill, hoping to save InuYasha from his own curiosity.

But...She was a little...Late.

InuYasha sat swooning to and fro, side to side, and his eyes were glassy. The Sharpie cap lay across from him, and Kagome clapped a hand to her forehead.

"Kagome!" Miroku and Shippo called in unison.

Without missing a beat in her eating frenzy, Sango soon appeared behind them on a transformed Kirara's back.

Miroku saw InuYasha's state, and looked down at the marker on the ground.

Now, do we see anything wrong with this picture?

1. Miroku.

2. Miroku with staff.

3. Miroku with staff and numerous scrolls at his disposal.

4. An 'evil' Sharpie that has 'harmed' his friend.

"EVIL BE GONE!" Miroku yelled, throwing a scroll at the innocent marker.

The strength of the throw caused the passing air to move the Sharpie out of the way. It started down into a hole, and InuYasha didn't miss it.

"BUBBLES! BUBBLYBUBBLESGIMMEBUBBLESHOOHOOBUBBLESHEEHEEMYBUBBLESBUBBLYBUBBLYBUBBLY!"

With a loud crash, InuYasha and the Sharpie went into the hole. And from the dark depths, the audience above could hear InuYasha's insane giggling.

"My bubbles."

And within moments the half demon was out of the hole and CUI...Chopping Under the Influence.

"BAMBOO! WOO HOO! BAMBOO!" InuYasha went through the bamboo thicket with the Tetsusaiga, hacking away happily as the Sharpie's effects ran through his sensitive senses.

He continued to run through the thicket until he ran into something rough and firm. He looked up at the tree he had just crashed into, and began to sing.

"Leanin' on a tree trunk, thinkin' all the same junk. Falling in and out of a dream. Back and forth I'm swaying, I'm contemplating staying. Laying and decaying when I know I must leave!"

He grabbed an approaching Kagome around the waist from the group and started dancing with her.

"Where do I aim when I shoot the breeze? How do I calm myself at times like these? I need a simple kind of lovely and the thought is just a novelty."

He leaned in to kiss her...But passed out and landed right at Sesshomaru's feet. The youkai looked down at his fainted half sibling and arched an eyebrow.

Kagome chuckled as her and Miroku grabbed InuYasha's feet.

"We were just leaving Sesshomaru! Maybe you can try to kill InuYasha some other time!" Miroku said, assisting Kagome in dragging the fallen silver hair across the ground.

"Humph. I merely came to see what all that racket about 'shooting the breeze' was. Now leave before I change my mind."

Kagome opened her mouth to say something smart, but decided she wanted to keep her head on through the rest of high school without the help of duct tape. The two put InuYasha on Kirara's back then left.

Sesshomaru shook his head, and turned to leave for the clearing where he had left Rin in Jaken's care. But, a small black and light gray tube on the ground caught his attention.

"Now what could this be?" He murmured before kneeling down and picking it up...

**END!- Uh oh...This can't be good! Please review!**


	2. Going Floral

**High Times in the Feudal Era Chapter Two: Going Floral**

**Note- Thanks to all my reviewers. You guys rock! I'm planning on doing Koga, Shippo, and Naraku Sharpie discoveries in this story. If any of you have a preference, just drop me an Email at Now, on with the craziness.**

It was a grey and black tube, something he had never seen before. But it's beauty awed him; the rounded ends, the incredible tattoos on it's side…Jaken was in love.

"Master Sesshomaru! Where did you find such a magnificent creature!" The frog like demon asked stroking the Sharpie gently.

Sesshomaru kept facing forward with his two companions behind him as always.

"I found it with Inuyasha. It seems to have some kind of manipulative powers."

Rin leapt down from Ahh and Uhm (how DO you spell that thing's name!) and ran to Jaken's side. Her curiosity took control, and she reached out for the tube.

"Manipulative powers, Master Sesshomaru?"

Jaken yanked the Sharpie from her reach and held it out at arms length.

"Rin! This could be dangerous! Think before you-"

He noticed his grip loosen, then looked at his empty hand. Frantically, Jaken began scouring the ground for his lost love. Rin had made her way up beside Sesshomaru and was throwing questions at him as children do.

"What do you think it smells like!"

"I don't know, Rin."

Pop, off came the top (heh, that rhymed). Rin inhaled deeply then coughed. Sesshomaru looked down at the little girl coughing, then yanked the Sharpie from her hand. His eyes began to turn an ominous red, and he called Jaken over for assistance.

"Take Rin…Now…"

Jaken took Rin's small hand and bolted into the forest. Sesshomaru's face began to lengthen, soon his body grew into his giant demon form.

"I will destroy you for harming Rin!"

His jaws shot down towards the offensive object, but then a strange scent caught his attention. The smell was radiating from the tube. He sniffed once, twice, then a third time. The smell was intoxicating, and he craved more. He lay down on his paws and began a continuous string of long inhales. That Kagome woman that his inferior half brother travels with once called him a cocker spaniel. He did some inside work on this 'cocker spaniel' which involved him sending Jaken to retrieve a dog book from Kagome's bag. The small white dog did look like a miniature version of his demon form…Only it was adorable.

"I…want to be…Adorable!" Sesshomaru roared.

He shifted back into his usual form and grabbed the Sharpie. He patted his kimono, then searched through the thick fur of his tail.

"I have no mirror…The river!" (What's up with me rhyming today!)

Sesshomaru ran to the river and leaned over the edge of the bank so he could clearly view his face. He removed the top of the Sharpie, and drug the tip of the marker across his eye lid. Once his eyes were lined, he colored in his lips, made his eyebrows thicker, then proceeded to highlight his tail. He glanced in the rover again, and squealed for joy.

"I'm adorable!" He skipped off, leaving the Sharpie by the river bank.

While he skipped through the forest, Sesshomaru found some flowers growing and let out another squeal.

"I'll be cuter than ever!"

He plopped down on his butt and began to weave flowers through his hair and tail, and even tucking them in the sheath of Tokijin. He was tucking two more behind his ears when Rin and Jaken came up to his side.

"Master Sesshomaru! You look so ridiculous!" Jaken cried.

"Your pretty, Master Sesshomaru!" Rin giggled, and started applying the flowers to Sesshomaru.

"Here, Rin! Let's put flowers on you, too!" Sesshomaru said, throwing flowers all over the giggling girl.

Jaken watched, horrified, as the duo decorated each other. And when the both of them looked like giant flower balls, Sesshomaru stood up, started to run to Jaken.

"Come on, Jaken! It's…your…Turn…" Sesshomaru's eyes drooped, he smiled, then passed out before his retainer.

Rin waddled over to Jaken, her girth more than quadrupled by flowers.

"What happened to Master Sesshomaru, Jaken?" She questioned innocently.

Jaken just shook his head, and fell to the ground in a fetal position.

"I don't know, Rin. I just don't want it to happen again!"

Jaken lay on a fetal position, and Sesshomaru was passed out, and Rin was just wondering how the heck she was going to manage to get out of her flowery prison.

………………………………...

"Wait up, Koga! Waaaait!"

Koga ignored the calls from behind him, and stopped to get a drink at the river. He dipped his head down, sipping the cool liquid. Something feel in the water beside him, catching his eye as it began to float down stream.

"Huh? What's this?" He murmured to himself, plucking the tube out of the water.

**END! Hee hee… Fun stuff, fun stuff! Please review!**


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